Reflections – Page 6

I may be a day late with my New Year post, but I hope it is not a dollar short. I have missed y’all!

NYE was another rainy day, as was this morning. Photo evidence below of NYE. Luckily, the rain moved on today. Darcy and I had a lovely, sunny walk while listening to sermons after lunch with my Grandparents, Mom, Aunt, and Cousin H to celebrate my mother’s birthday. I am back to my normal working schedule tomorrow and am looking forward to it.

I am excited to hit the ground running…or at least walking and not standing still.

It seems like it was yesterday that we were beginning 2016 with such hope and optimism. Time is funny that way, how it feels so fast. I remember when they began doing the state 200_s quarters and thinking how it was going to be SO LONG until they released the Texas quarter in, if my memory serves me, 2005. It still feels weird to me that we are in the 2000s. You would think being 2017 I would be used to it. It feels like it has gone by so quickly. In three years, it will be 2020. I will be 32 in 2020. Woof.

Anyway, I digress. No surprises there. I begin 2017 the same as I began 2016. Full of hope and optimism. Yes, it has been a hard year for a myriad of reasons, but there are always going to be hard and difficult times. The light is that there are even more great and wonderful times (yes, even in 2016). AHAmoment. I am looking forward to those times. I know there are great things in store. That will be my focus. I am going to be open to receive the gifts and allow them to happen.

I said that I was only going to make one resolution this year. I am going to change that. I am going to spend this year focusing on myself and getting myself back on track. Practicing self love. Setting my priorities. Stop making excuses. That is going to be my resolution. Naturally, that in itself involves a few different things. This list will likely change throughout the year, but here is my start:

Pray with intention while I make my bed every morning
Read my Bible every day (I am one day away from finishing Genesis. Woohoo! Let us not discuss the days that I have missed since I last spoke of this…)
See the positive
Stop making excuses
Ride more, worry less. Ride at least once a week (as much as I hate to admit this, riding once a week for the past few months has been hard to manage between stuff that just needs to get done, chores, weather, my utter lameness, and, and, and….EXCUSES. It is like it has become a habit and I do not even recognize myself. I never used to miss a ride day before. Don’t judge me, I am trying not to judge myself. Can I go hide under a blanket now?)
Make a schedule with support system for riding Lito so I am not by myself. This is going to be hard, but it is time to move forward with his training. I have to do something.
Exercise on non ride days
Attend at least one clinic
Have at least 6 lessons
Attend at least one show

I think this is harder to admit than my fears. I want to thank you, dear readers, for being here and helping to hold me accountable. I am not perfect and I know I will likely fail some days and weeks, but is there really failure if you grow and learn from it?

I have already done item 1, 3, 4, and 6. Item 2 is next. Tomorrow I am going to start my research for clinics and shows to build my calendar.

What are your resolutions? Are they hard for you to admit? I will help hold you accountable if you need or want it.

Walk in love, dear readers.

Just like everyone else it seems, I too am reflective at year end. Many reflect on goals achieved, resolutions kept, or all the great things that have happened. I achieved some goals, kept zero resolutions, and did have some great things happen this year.

However, this particular year has been colored with many terrible events, which I will not continue to belabor at present (just read back if you are curious), that seem to overshadow the good. I literally, between typing words, just spilled my champagne on myself while I was trying to take a sip. Very good adulating going on here. Can I get a participation award?

I think my only two resolutions this year will be to stop spilling on myself while drinking and to ride more. I guarantee that only one will be kept.

I find myself wanting to hide until 2017 emerges just so nothing bad can happen, but alas, we can not hide from anything, no matter how hard we try. AHAmoment. When we try to hide, we are not able to see the good things that are happening around us and to us. I know this logically, but dang, it is hard sometimes.

Just a few hours ago I found out that my grandmother has had a fall and is having surgery tomorrow. Praise the Lord that it was not worse. The surgery is expected to be quick and she should have less down time than last time. That is the bright side. I need another glass of wine.

A little something I read today gave me a little perspective and gives me my message to this past year: Goodbye 2016, I won’t be looking back. Thank you to Mallory of AdultAmmyStrong for sharing your story. It has helped me. I also shared it with a friend of mine. I am so grateful to have my horses and my dog. When I feel like it is too hard to move forward, I do for them.

I am watching Love Actually this evening. The viewing of this movie used to be a Christmas tradition with my sisters and cousins. It has now faded away with the changing tides, but I still watch it every year at least once. Funny thing is I feel like this (the song part…and the love part) is a good summation of 2016 and how Christmas kinda felt. PSA…this is explicit and not PG-13!

I will not hide for the rest of 2016. I am going to fake it till I make it. It is not all bad. Can you hear my determination? I will dance like Billy Mack to the final count down.

I am going to go pour myself another glass of wine, try not to spill on myself, and watch the rest of the movie.

Walk in love, dear readers. I am only taking small steps as present. You can take small steps with me.