I awoke a full hour before my alarm was to go off at 6:30 AM. An extra hour of sleep would be nice before a long road trip.
But. Here I lay. Fully energized and rearing to go. Excited to get where we are going. However, I am forcing myself to stay in bed because that was the plan. No sense in getting everything finished early just to sit and wait again. Silly, right?
Anyway, here I am, writing to you since clearly the prospect of sleep is leaving as quick like as the sun is about to rise. And because Darcy dog is not here to cuddle. Which, is not so fun, not having my dog with me.
I played on my phone a bit when I first realized there would be no more sleep. Then I put it down and tried again. No luck. Picked it up again. I was reminded of a song. You know how that happens.
Here I am, laying in bed. Having the luxury of lounging in bed for an hour before I need to do anything. About to gather everything my horse and I need for a week, load it up, and head out with R for a week of riding and fellowship.
How did I get here? How am I able to do these things that I love? Have these horses that I have? How blessed am I?
I get to do all these things because my parents worked their tails off and did everything they could for us. Because they taught us to work our tails off. To do the right thing. To not give up on our dreams and wishes. To do what makes our hearts happy. To have faith and give thanks to the Man upstairs for it all who makes it all possible.
Even when we didn’t realize or appreciate it.
I give thanks to the Lord. I give thanks to my parents and family. And I give thanks to my horse.
Corny as it may sound, it is all true.
Time to get up and get moving. R will soon be on her way!
Walk in love, dear readers! I will see you in a week!
You didn’t think you would get off that easy, did you. A song. For you.
I am good like that.
Not quite describing our relationship, but ya…It is still a good song.
I spent the last two days at a conference for work. The reason for my silence. I did not have sneak attackcoffee this time! There was a man yesterday who did. Also on a white shirt. I smiled at him with a knowing look and told him I did the same thing six months ago here and to just use his name tag to cover it. I also had to do a big presentation there on Wednesday that went pretty well. I should say I GOT to do a big presentation. We had a few people that came by our booth because of my presentation! So, we will see what happens.
I hope y’all have a happy Friday and a good end to the work week!
Get out there and do what makes your heart happy this weekend. You know what I will be doing. Going to the farm with my Darcy girl to see my ponies.
Mike McClure is one of my favorites, so that is reason enough to share, yes? That and this song keeps coming up, probably for a reason.
“Everything that I have been through
stands here in my shoes.
Every knock down, drag out
Every broken bone and bruise.
Every time I bet it all
convinced I wouldn’t lose,
knee deep in the powder
trying to light my own fuse.
No there a’int nothing new
under the sun.
Ya, one story ends
and anther has begun.
is still spinnin’ around.
All that we have lost,
some day will be found.
Everything I once thought
has flown out of my mind
and everything I outran
has now left me far behind.
Every road it just keeps rollin’
ya, they twist and turn and wind.
I don’t know if it’s an accident
or by some grand design.
But there a’int nothing new
under the sun.
Ya, one story ends
and anther has begun.
is still spinnin’ around.
All that we have lost,
some day will be found.
Well the tides have all turned inward
and the rocks are washed with waves.
There is a broken bottle on the beach,
but the note has blown away.
It was prolly just a riddle
written down in rhyme.
A little more of the same old,
one more time.
No there a’int nothing new
under the sun.
One story ends
and anther has begun.
is still spinnin’ around.
All that we have lost,
some day will be found.”
One thing I do know, nothing is accident. It is a grand, divine design. It will all come full circle in time.
I will admit, that this is a Bible story I did not know until I heard the song. Hearing the song intrigued me and I looked it up. Any of you know much about it? Do share! I would love to hear your thoughts. There are plenty of thoughts out there around this story.
I have never understood the whole quarter life or mid life crisis thing. Always was an odd concept to me. A conundrum. I jokingly throw around the term at times. I typically think of age as just a number. A number that many people use as an excuse or something to dread. Or view as a ticking time bomb or one of those daily flip calendars with a finite number of pages. The truth is, you are the age you feel you are. I have never really felt my age, even when I was little. Dare I say that I typically think of myself as an old soul. I read somewhere that one should never admit to that if you ever want to get married. Well, I just did. I suppose I am doomed now.
“Yeah there are different roads to happiness
I took a different path I guess
Came out on the others side just fine
The losing side of twenty five”
Turning twenty five was no big deal for me like everyone makes it out to be. Well, on second thought, maybe it was. I was either twenty four or five when I died my hair on a whim. Making the decision as I walked in the door of the salon. Pretty out of character for this planner. It was supposed to be redish and my parents freaked out like I had gone to the dark side and said it was purple. It wasn’t purple, at least not after it faded.
Twenty six was a big one. When I turned twenty six I felt like I was kicked on my bum out of the nest, falling on a large stick puncturing my wallet as I had to get my own health insurance policy. A puncture that just keeps getting bigger. Like some terrible kind of graduation gift that just keeps on giving. I called that a quarter life crisis to be funny, but honestly, I still do not know why it felt like such a big deal. Everyone has to do it. The hair dying was probably closer to a crisis, depending on who you ask. Some people may even call this blog, created almost a year ago, a quarter life crisis.
“My regrets are far and few between
and I can’t say that they’ve cost me a thing.
Except some money and a little bit of love,
But I’ll give that up.
If I can say that I am still my own
Without the rules that they forced upon.
At least since they day that I was had
because I can’t go back.”
At twenty eight, I sometimes feel like I am back where I was at twenty three, fresh out of undergrad, wondering why on earth I worked to graduate on time and give up my ability to ride every day. Still with an urge to dye my hair and blame it on a quarter life crisis just because. Just because I feel antsy. Questioning my life decisions and wondering. What is next? What am I supposed to be learning here?
I don’t think a season of life in transition, with God pushing me into rest, prayer, and waiting, can be considered a quarter life crisis. That is what I think most people do.
Here is the thing though. Everyone is in their own boat on the same sea. It is all a part of the journey. AHAmoment. The path. Individual and unique, just like you. The end destination is the same for everyone on different roads with different challenges. Might as well enjoy the ride! Look back at the end and marvel at what was experienced and accomplished instead of regrets or what went wrong. There will be many more seasons of transition to prepare you for what is next, often feeling like the waves going up and down the beach. One minute you think you are up and then the next you are back. The key is to stay the course. Just like working with a horse. One bad ride does not doom the next. Give them time to learn and figure it out. One mistake does not define a life. Mistakes do not exist if we learn from them. Be patient. Pray. Learn and grow. It is hard, yes, but in due time, His time, you will know what the next step is and when to take it. The next season will begin.
“When you are at war with yourself, you are bound to lose.”
So, no. No crisis. Never was and never will be. I am over here, happily in transition. Faithfully waiting. My current season of rest. Still. It does not come easy for me, but with His help, it will get easier. I will be prepared.
I’m not going to dye my hair, don’t worry. At least I don’t think so.
How I get to all of that from listening to one song is a wonder to me. Hello? Did I lose you? Anyone still there?
The good news is, the strangles scare was just that, a scare. I will still check each horse just in case while I am out tending to my Lito man. Speaking of Lito. He still seems to be recovering well and is enjoying his short workouts. Keeping sound with no added heat or swelling. Barring any schedule changes, we should be ready for his vet check by Wednesday or Thursday next week. Fingers crossed, dear readers.
OK, so I am still processing my last week…and am still tired! Tomorrow, be prepared for a picture book of my week riding in the hill country! For now though, we must all wait. I can not begin to process that just yet. Yawn. I am still recovering!
Oh!!! I can show you the gifts I gave! Looky looky!!! Remember I told you about a few gifts I made for some friends that were going to be on the ride this past week? Now that the gifts have been given, I can show you! I gave each a photo transfer of their horse on a block of wood with character (have a look at this post to learn how!) and a piece I found created by Alex Ladner, also on a block of wood. I think they are just exact. I really tried to work with the character within the wood and let it shine and compliment the photo. I gave a few more photo transfers to some others, but these two are my favorite. Do you like them??? I hope so.
OK, back to perspective. The Friday before I left for my trip, I rediscovered an artist! I love when that happens. I started listening to Sean McConnell while in undergrad. He was getting some air time on a local Red Dirt station at the time. I loved his sound, but then somehow I did not keep up with him. Not sure why. Crazy how that happens. Anyway, while at work on Friday, I was listening so some shuffle mix that came up on YouTube. I was working away when I heard the song ‘Lie Baby Lie,’ but a different version than what used to be played in the flatland when I was in college. It intrigued me and I went to go look at who it was that was playing and singing. To my surprise, it was Sean! I immediately went to look up all of the material he has created since I stopped listening to him. I still dig his stuff and I am still listening to it this week! One song in particular really spoke to me that Friday. Have a listen, and when you need perspective, give it another listen. I have added it to my mental file of ‘when I need perspective.’ I hope you enjoy it. Thanks to the man himself, Sean McConnell, for posting this vid on YouTube. He also has several faith based songs. I have no doubt that I will be post on his songs again!
Have a blessed day, dear readers, and lead with love!
Happy Monday Morning! I hope everyone had a great weekend! As promised, (here is your teaser)
I have for you all the fall things my cousin and I did yesterday (although I have to warn you, I was bad and forgot about taking photos), but first I just have to tell you about the rest of my weekend.
I had a great dinner with a dear friend of mine on Friday. I have not seen her in about five years. She was in town looking at a possible second horse to buy. She did not end up buying the horse (sad for her), but we had the BEST time catching up on all the things! It was so lovely. After dinner I drove out to the farm to spend the weekend with family and horsing around. Saturday morning, I went for a walk ride with my mother. I ride and she walks. It is our thing. We had AMAZING burgers for lunch. Instead of a nap (which I really wanted) my nephew and I went for a drive around the property and down the road. That boy is so sweet. We had a grand time with the fall air in our hair. I got a blister from mucking, raking, and cleaning the barn. Cheetah and I had a nice lazy dink around the arena. After feeding the evening feeding, my mom, sister, and niece came out to the barn to have some horse time for my niece. She LOVED it and got and gave many kisses with the horses and Petunia the donkey.
Sunday morning was my Lito time. That horse. Man. He is just amazing. It was his 8th or 9th ride and he has not been ridden in about a month. First ride with a bit. He was great. Never offered anything bad and seems to really enjoy riding. He was little confused at the ‘new’ communication form as to be expected (he as been wearing the bit for a while and we have worked with it on the ground), but he was his usual steady eddy, lazy self. We took it easy because of the bit introduction and the fact that he as not been ridden in a while. He makes me want another youngster. Not that I need one. By the way, my news feeds have been full of nice Spanish fillies for sale. It is just not nice to me. Then my nephew had his turn to ‘ride’ on Chance. He rides, I lead. We had a grand time. How profound, I know, but it just was. Between family, horses, Texas countryside, and weather, it is hard not to have a full heart and be happy.
OK, on to all the Fall things with my cousin yesterday evening. I made a roasted butternut squash flatbread pizza for dinner. In addition to the squash, it had pesto, bacon, goat cheese, balsamic red onions, arugula, and sage. It was so good! Sorry I do not have a picture. We were too excited for photos. We then made this Magic Pumpkin Cake for dessert. It was naughty and pretty good. I am usually more of a made from scratch kind of gal, but it is nice to do easy things sometimes that just require dumping and stirring. I think it will be better today after sitting in the fridge over night. I also would use a white cake mix instead of a yellow cake. Then we painted some pumpkins for table centerpieces. I was pretty conservative with my painting. I just thought their natural beauty should be able to shine and I also did not want to get wrapped up in something really detailed and intricate…which is what I usually do. I used some metallic paint and glitter that my cousin brought. I mixed them in a bowl with some unpainted pumpkins. My favorite is the little orange one with the metallic accents in the creases and on the stem. Very simple, but complimenting and pretty. What are your favorite fall things? My cousin and I always do baking and or crafts the minute the weather cools.
Brandon Rhyder is still as on point for me today as he was on Friday. This song written by Jon Randall was basically my weekend (sorry, this is not the best recording). I sure hope you have read this far and can enjoy this song. He gets me. I may have been born and still live in the big city, but being in the country has made me into who I truly am. I am so grateful to my parents for that.
This song. It is where IT is at. What IT is all about. It is what is in your heart. It is about love. The memories that remind us and bring us joy. What we have learned from what He has shown us. The grace and unending love of our Lord. Our ultimate and great destination in heaven. That we are never alone. Something no man can take away. AHA moment.
This song helped me with the passing of our sweet Mansebo. Makes me tear up. I will probably lean on it forever. Love the songs that evoke such emotion. I listened to it non stop on the day and on the one year anniversary. I could not talk about it though. Thankfully, I can now. Thanks to Stewart Mann (The Statesboro Revue) and Gordy Quist (The Band of Heathens) for the song writing and The Statesboro Revue for recording this song.
Do y’all like this song as much as I do? Share a song like this if you have one!
As promised, today I have brought you a little something about me, but first I want to do a little bragging. Yesterday I went out to ride Bella the buckskin. Man was she great! They always get worse before they get better, as they say. She was very relaxed, was better about keeping her shoulder up, and was straighter. Her walk and trot are really coming along and getting more adjustable. The canter/lope has a ways to go, especially to the left. It will come with time. OK, OK, on to what I promised.
Oil & gas geologist by day (hey, it pays for…hay. Ha! See what I did there?) and seeker of the flame by, well, all the time.
A few things you might be intrigued to know about me: ~I have a personal relationship with Jesus Christ. I try to live my life the way He intended and walk the path He created.
~I struggle with what my true vocation is.
~I have a masters in geology.
~I am a 9th generation Texan and yes, I am proud of that. Love this great state.
~I am a horse person. I have two heart horses of my own. Self trained…Well, really they train me.
~I am also a dog person. I have one dog.
~My animals make me a better human.
~My family and friends are my world.
~I am a self-proclaimed music junkie. I dig Texas, Red Dirt, Western, and Classic Country and Americana…and R&B…and Classical…and Gospel…Mariachi…Most of what I listen to does not fit in any one box. Go figure.
~I read incessantly about horse training, horse/human relationships/history, and faith. Throw in a few sappy romance novels, too.
~The parallels between horses and life are astounding to me.
~I never want to stop getting better and growing as a rider. I do not limit myself to one riding discipline.
~I like to share what the Lord and my animals teach me. Those are both one in the same, aren’t they?
~I do not like to have my picture taken, but I LOVE to take photos and I secretly want people to like my photos.
~Sometimes I think I was born in the wrong generation. However, air conditioning sure is great.
~I love to cook and bake.
~I can not spell!…and my grammar can be rather sketchy. Please be gracious and forgive me my mistakes.
I love my job and career, do not get me wrong, but horses are my true passion. People ask me all the time why I did not turn horses into a career. I made the conscious decision when I went off to school to study something that I both liked and would ensure me a good career, awarding me the freedom to follow my passion wherever it led. In my life, I have met a few people that turned their passion into work and lost the love in the process. It was both visible and palpable. I also know people on the other side of that coin. People that have built a career from their passion and have not lost the love. I did not want to lose the love, so I chose a different route. Was this the right choice? I do not know. You can bet on one thing, I will let you know when I learn the answer.
I believe that God speaks to everyone in a different and personal way. For me, it is through animals, nature, and music…horses in particular. One day, I hope to figure out why that is and use it for good. The similarities of working with horses and living life is a truly beautiful and astounding thing.
They say my love for horses began the moment I first saw a horse and has only grown since. I was that kid that everyone knew as ‘that horse girl’ and I just never grew out of that ‘phase.’ I am probably more horse crazy now than I ever was. It stems from somewhere deep in my genes, I think.
My Great Uncle took this photo of my Grandmother on her pony, Pinto. I just love it.
My Grandmother with her pony, Pinto.
My maternal grandmother.
My father’s side of the family.
After much begging, my mother finally allowed me to start riding when I was about six years old. I started out showing Saddlebreds with my sister, the same way my mother and grandmother learned to ride. I only got 30 minutes a week, but I lived for that half hour. We showed lightly on the local circuit. I must go find these photos. I was so wee sized on those tall horses and I thought you had to completely stand up in the stirrups while posting!
My family then purchased a farm and some ranch horses when I was nine years old so we could be raised as they were; spending every weekend out in the country. Those horses, one of which we are fortunate to still have at over 30 years of age, taught me what it means to be a horsewoman and a better human being. I rode, and still ride, at least once a week. Yay for weekends! I spent three summers in Mexico taking dressage and jumping lessons from three different international trainers. I really took to the dressage and am still passionate about learning more. I am eternally grateful for this experience because it made me the rider I am today and taught me that in every ride we are teaching the horse something, good or bad. There are some of these photos somewhere too…I am the youngest kid…my parents were tired!
In high school, I joined the local 4-H Horse Club where we participated in clinics and shows in various performance and speed events.
Fresca, my palomino ‘heinz 57’ mare I had growing up. We were good at carrying the flag in the opening ceremony.
Fresca, y palomino ‘heinz 57’ mare I had growing up. Here we are competing in western pleasure. She was not a western pleasure type horse!
When I went off to college for my undergraduate, I was not able to bring a horse with me, so I joined the polo club my freshman year. I still love to stick and ball! I then interned for the director of the university’s equestrian center where I trained program and sale horses, assisted in horse sales, led summer horseback riding camps, and helped run local horse shows. I got to ride two to three horses a day! Every day! I still dream about it *sigh*. While working there, I found and worked off the payment of my dun Appendix Quarter Horse mare, Cheetah. Her name suits her personality.
Stripes for days.
The fourth and final year of my undergraduate degree, I helped my friend start and run her private boarding and event horse training facility. When I moved back home with my mare, I bred her to a PRE (Pura Raza Espanola/ Pure Spanish Horse/Andalusian). The perfect thing to do while in grad school! My father would still beg to differ with me on that one. She foaled in 2013 and gave me the best dun colt a gal could ask for. His name is Manolito, I call him Lito. I now have the breeding bug bad!
Love at first sight.
I lied, there can be too much cuteness.
He has his mother’s ears!
He has grown to over 16 hh. and likely has more to go. I have lightly started him under saddle and, eventually, we will go to some dressage and working equitation shows. I might even bring his dam along and put her through her paces. These days I am just trying to figure out how to have my career and advance my horses while navigating life…trying to fit in a social life here and there. It has it’s challenges that I am sure many of you can relate to.
Man that is A LOT of talking about myself. Now I am tired. This weekend is my nephew’s 4th birthday party and I will then be running away to the farm to unplug and ride my horses! You will definitely not hear from me till Monday. Have a great weekend, interwebbers!
I have a friend that I have known for quite some time. She has been on my mind because I am worried about her. Her life has taken her on an interesting path, but more than that, it both looks and feels wrong for her. It is hard to find the words to describe the feeling. She is fighting for it so hard like she is trying to prove a point and make it fit. This is what troubles me and what I do not understand. I worry for her because I want the best for her. I pray that she finds the right path that not only fits her, but that also she fits the path. I also pray for my own understanding. Maybe it is right for her and it is my viewpoint that is skewed and blinded. It is a struggle for me to accept the things I do not understand.
Some things we are not meant to understand. This I know. There are things I do not understand and alone, I can not change. This immediately makes me think of two things: the Serenity Prayer by Reinhold Niebuhr and the song “Horseshoe Lake” by Will Kimbrough and Tod Snider (It was also recorded by the band No Justice).
“God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can, and wisdom to know the difference.”
Whether it is about work, a friend, or anything else, prayer helps me with these things. Over time (sometimes a very long time), prayer gives me the serenity and understanding. Getting away, unplugging, and recharging also helps. Naturally, this makes me think of another song, but that will be another story for another day. Anyway, I try to get out of town and in the countryside or by water for at least a few hours every week. Doing this clears my mind of all the clutter and I am able to hear and see God more clearly. My prayers become deeper and I can really feel His presence.
Please enjoy these versions of “Horseshoe Lake” with the lyrics posted below.