When Holidays Are Hard.

On December 22, 2023 By AveryIn Dogs, Faith, Life6 Comments

Joy, it is here! I practically yelled that at you yesterday.

I am still yelling it and feeling it today, but as we all know, life is funny. Facebook slapped me with a memory of one of my Darcy’s Christmas portraits and it just sucker punched me right in the gut.

I was almost literally stomach sick (no mincing words here!). This happens from time to time, that is how grief and memories work, but I also had a dream about her earlier this week and I just can not get her off my mind. So many memories. So many feelings. I tell you I could almost feel her in my arms in the broad light of day.

I got to thinking and I realized that in the last eight years, I have experienced eight deaths. Three of which were tragically devastating.

What a statistic. Numbers are just that, numbers, but that is kind of a lot of deaths in a short period of time for someone who had previously not really experienced any beyond the passing of a well loved pet that lived well into its golden years.

Grief is funny in that when you are in it and close to it, the loss and the myriad of emotions that constitute grief lace all your thoughts and actions. You can not escape it and it seems to shape all you do. Blessedly, time does goes on and it morphs into something a little different bit by bit, but it is always a part of you, part of your inner tapestry, shaping you in different ways and giving you life perspective.

The point of all of this is that the holidays can be a very hard and lonely time for many people for any number of reasons, but chief among them is that in this time of togetherness and in the reflectiveness of winter, one thinks of those they can not gather with.

However, this is the AHA moment. One thing that we ALL share is loss. Grief is something that, while unique to each individual, is a universal connector of us all. NOBODY is alone in their grief for the simple reason that everybody has it. Even if it feels like you are alone at times. When you are in it, you can not see much else.

Here is what I want to tell you. What I have come to live for myself.

Through all the grief and loss there is another side to discover. Somewhat removed, but in a bird’s eye view kind of way. Not just a light at the end of the tunnel as they say.

There is triumphant gratitude.

Gratitude to the souls you got to encounter.

Gratitude for being able to be grateful for the grief.

I am wonderfully changed because of it all and you, my dear readers, will be changed as well.

I want to share this with you this year because I can and because you, and anyone and everyone else you know, are not alone in your grief.

It is important for me to share this, not just for me, but for all of you as well.

You are not alone and the light and the joy are there and they were with you the whole time.

We will always have our moments, that is how it works, but it does not last.

I am living proof and I am here to tell you.

Walk in love, dear readers. Share it and spread it far and wide!

Joy.

On December 21, 2023December 21, 2023 By AveryIn Life, MusicLeave a comment

Good morning, dear readers! Or, whatever time of day it happens to be for you wherever you are!

I just wanted to tell you that joy abounds this very day.

It may begin with you or it may begin with a stranger.

Let it grow, dear readers. Choose to believe it and choose to see it. Let it spread.

It is there!

I was blessed by strangers today and I pray that I blessed others in return.

I had to go downtown this morning to the County Clerk’s office to record a deed. Yes, I realize you can do this by mail, but we needed it done in a timely manner and I had never done this before so I wanted to learn about it by doing it in person. I find it humorous that I never go downtown and I will be there twice by the end of the day.

Anyway, I got up early and finished my eggnog cake for Friday this morning and then got dressed and in the truck before 7:15 to make my way downtown well before 8. I had to find parking, pay for said parking, and get to the door ideally before anyone else. I got there in a round about way because I missed a turn of course (we will not talk about how I made a big goof yesterday by making the wrong turn, so much for GPS), but I was able to find a spot a block down.

While I was in the process of gathering my things, I was approached by a man on the street. I will admit to wanting to ignore him and send him on his way while I thought about how to protect my purse. He babbled on about this and that and all I heard was cancer and tacos pondering what to do. At some point I realized that he was offering to help me use the parking meter correctly to avoid extra fees if I needed it…in exchange for tacos. Still being somewhat confused, I accepted his offer while he told me about his cancer and how how he was about to go in for another chemo treatment. He was very nice and respectful and wanted to show me the taco stand around the corner, presumably so I knew that it was tacos he wanted and not something else.

Now, I am aware that this story could go in any which way and very likely in a bad direction. I just did not feel like this was that kind of situation. We talked for a little bit and I gave him some money for tacos and coffee. He was extremely grateful. I asked him his name, to which he told me was Anthony, and I gave him a hug and a prayer.

I made my way down to the courthouse passing many smiling people. Normally I find that people just look down or have a scowl on their face. I walked into the building and made my way through security…more in depth security than you will find at the airport. TSA is not accepted there, if you were wondering. I asked as I was told I had to take my shoes off. They offered a laugh at my question, possibly in pity. They more than thoroughly went through my purse after it was scanned and smiled and laughed at my ridiculous number of keys. They said I must be a busy person to which I had no response but a smile and a nod. They wished me good day and a Merry Christmas after pointing me in the direction of the County Clerk’s office.

I arrived outside the door five minutes to 8 AM and I was the only person waiting. The door was opened at 8 and I was so nicely asked what I needed. I halfway thought he asked because I looked like I needed help, but I was happy for it none the less, maybe I did look that way. I was still surprised by my morning thus far. I told him what I was there for and he said with enthusiasm, “Yes mam, right this way to the right!” I practically snapped to and said with as much enthusiasm, “THANK YOU!”

The office was joyfully decorated and everyone had a smile on. I followed the signs and stopped at the stop sign. The lady at the window smiled brightly and asked what she could do for me. Her desk was so clean and organized, but it also had very personal things on it including her devotional. The whole encounter was just so nice. She was so happy and helpful and smiley. Is that even a real word? It is now. The whole errand took less than five minutes. She told me she loved my name and that it sounded like a super hero! Color me whatever you wish, but that made me stand up taller! I said thank you about five times and we both wished each other a Merry Christmas.

As I walked back through the building, I swear it got more festive. Everyone was wearing something red and green. Even those in uniform. I complimented everyone and everyone was saying Merry Christmas! On my way back to the truck were even more smiling people! I passed someone carrying red and green cupcakes and I told her to have fun at the party, to which she beamed.

Anthony was not there when I got back to my truck. Hopefully he was filling his belly with tacos.

Joy is here, dear readers.

Love is here.

God is here.

Everyone is in different circumstances and it can be had to see it. The light, it is here.

Walk in love, dear readers!

Enjoy some of my Christmas favorites to help you get in the spirit!

Christmas Spirit Cuteness.

On December 7, 2023December 5, 2023 By AveryIn Dogs, Horses3 Comments

OK, dear readers, I am here for you to help jumpstart your Christmas Spirit!

You heard me, I am here for YOU!

So.

I have just a whole pile of cuteness for you to get you ramped up. Long time readers know that I like to take Christmas portraits of my animals. For today, walk with me through time and our past portraits to set the stage!

You will have to wait until tomorrow for this year’s. It is one of my own traditions to do every year and this year is no different. It generally makes for great fun. I say generally as you may notice the most recent portraits look a little…bah humbug! Grinch like if you will.

ANYWAY.

To make you smile, I give you my animals who have grown tired of my antics. Enjoy a step back in time from 2022 and beyond.

Stay tuned for 2023! Will they be the grinchiest???

Walk in love, dear readers! Pass it along to one and all!

This Is Where We Are At.

On December 13, 2022December 13, 2022 By AveryIn Horses, Music8 Comments

I just have to laugh. This is just one of those years! We are just not with it! But I will tell you what, we will get there before it is over no matter what! Something a little more like ‘coming in hot’ rather than ‘fake it till you make it’ I would say.

So, this is where we are at. Happy Christmas!

I forgot to give my friend (Thanks K!) her elf hat and necklaces back to her after we rode in a Christmas float parade this past weekend, so I naturally decided to put them to work getting Merle and the Dun Duo’s annual portraits before I left the farm this past weekend since I had yet to do anything about them. Like I said, coming in HOT. But, anything is better than nothing. I think the Dun Duo might have begged to differ this year.

Anyway, we have been getting a lot of rain and mud has been the name of the game around here. LOTS of mud. Riding has been at a minimal recently, which probably explains a lot! I did not even groom the horses is how last minute this very impromptu session was. Between their dirty coats and the looks they were giving me, I felt like they were sending me a message…and it was not an overly festive one!

Something tells me they were not enthused.

Cheetah tossed the hat more times than I could count! She would not really even look at me. When she would look in my general direction, she would either glare or close her eyes. I think she even rolled them a time or two. I also could not have taken a good photo that day for the life of me!

It is a little hard to call them Christmas ponies or Santa’s helpers. Lito was even ‘better.’

I think Lito learned his looks from his mother.

I am pretty sure he tossed the hat into the mud on purpose.

When I went to find Merle for his torture session, I discovered he had gotten into something bad. This dog, I swear. He has the worst kind of witching hour. Between the hours of 5 and 7 PM is when bad things happen. He found bees or wasps or a snake or something. His whole face started to swell. Always something! The good news is he seemed fine other than in appearances. I luckily or unluckily have some experience with snake bites in dogs and this did not appear to be a snake bite. I gave him a couple Benadryl and decided to try again another day. It was not working out for us!

Anyway, the work week started in earnest and I started looking at the Christmas weather forecast (possible spoiler alert, it may be very cold with stuff falling from the sky…which means I will likely be away from home at the farm taking care of the animals) and the thought creeped into my head that maybe I do not get a tree this year.

And. And. And.

WHAT!?!

Who am I!

I basically slapped myself this evening on my way home. Get with it, sister! Get into the spirit! Yikes!

So. I called around and then drove to find our little tree and turned up the festivity! A little late, but that never hurt anybody! I am now enjoying a glass of bubbley out of a chipped glass of my grandmother’s with my lit and decorated tree and house while the Christmas music plays.

And, yes, Merle will get some photos too, but we will all just have to wait for that.

This is where we are at. We are here and we are present. We are in the spirit! Join us!

Play some of this new Christmas music and turn your festivity up too! Keep scrolling if you need some of our past years’ photos to help you turn up your cheer! If you can you the word ‘festive’ and any of its derivatives as much as me, you get a special prize.

Walk in love, dear readers!

Happy December.

On December 1, 2021 By AveryIn Dogs, Horses, Life, Uncategorized2 Comments

Onwards and upwards, right?!

I am dubbing this December, “Happy December.”

Just go with it, it is a thing, OK!?

I do not know about y’all, but this 2021 year is trying to finish out worse than that other year. So, I have decided to just not let it be that way. December does not have a choice. With your help, we are going to make this a rockin’ awesome December! Trust me, we can gang up on it and make it so! Check back here all month for happy things! We are going to use this month to solidify our Christmas spirit so we can take it with us into the new year 2022. (Yikes, that sounds funny! 2022! How did we already get there?!)

So, just for you, on this first day of this joyous month, I am dragging out the tried and true.

Yes, I know I share these every year, but they are so dang cute and happy. I am just gearing you up for this year’s pictures! Besides, how do these not make you joyous?!

Walk in love, dear readers, have a great Wednesday and an even better December 2021!

If you have anything happy and joyous to share, share it with me!

Transformation

On May 13, 2021May 13, 2021 By AveryIn Dogs, Horses6 Comments

Need a pick-me-up?

Or a reminder for how old you are? No, forget about that, let us get back to the pick-me-up part!

I have just what you need. This will surely do it.

It is Thursday after all and we all know how I like alliteration, even if it is a social media thing…it is Transformation Thursday!

Anyway.

April, May, and June are an animal birthday trifecta over here! It just occurred to me. So much to celebrate!

My Lito turned eight (WHAT?) in April.

Cheetah girl will turn seventeen (again, huh?) here in five days.

Merley bob will be a big fat two on June 17th.

Where has the time gone? This is more than just a time warp.

Get some more coffee or tea and enjoy. The work will be there when your break is over.

Let us begin.

My Lito man.

From this…

I first saw Lito about thirty minutes after he was born. I about fainted when I first saw him.

He has really grown up! He was big from the start and he has not stopped being big!

To this…

He hated that birthday hat, so do not ask him about it. He hated it so much in fact, I could not even bring myself to post the pictures on his birthday.

He has grown into his legs, but he is decidedly tall at about 16.3 hh! I do think he is still getting wider. At least I really hope so. He is a slow developer, so we will see!

My Cheetah girl.

From this…

I started riding Cheetah when she was in her four year old year and she became mine at some point during that year. These are the earliest photos I have of her from her three year old year. At one point, my friend T found some foal pics of her, but unfortunately they are lost on an old computer of mine that I long ago lost entry to. Those pics were at an ugly duckling phase to say the least, so I am not too upset about it! Now her three year old pictures, well, that was decidedly not an ugly duckling phase.

To this…

She looks the same to me now as she did then.

This was her yesterday. It is a terrible picture, yes I know, but I do not care. She was dirty and hot and bothered by the mosquitos. She is out of shape as she has been out of work for months.

She may have some arthritis that plagues her and she may have some gray over here eyes and on her legs, but she is still my girl. My queen. She has given me so much and she continues to give. She has carried me through so much. She may not get as much of the spotlight these days because of Lito, but she will always and forever be my number one. We are still working through her arthritis/lameness issues and I do hope to have some news to share soon. My prayer is that we can get her comfortable and sound without having to give regular medication. It is a process.

My Merley.

From this…

To this…

Does that photo look familiar?

Well…

That would be because we have done this photo before!

Clearly at different times of year though! Same dog, same tree. Different year, different sunset.

I bet he will be a firecracker for years to come! I just hope he does not give me too many gray hairs. I am pretty sure he has already given me a few. That however, is a story for another day.

Do not forget to smile and breathe today. Forgive and have grace.

Walk in love, dear readers.

It Is A New Year.

On January 1, 2021January 1, 2021 By AveryIn Dogs, Faith, Horses, LifeLeave a comment

Yes, indeed, that is fact. It is a new year.

This morning I am sitting in a warm house with coffee and homemade pumpkin bread after feeding and mucking out the barn. A perfect time to talk with you, dear readers!

Say peace out to 2020! Say it all you like if that is what brings you joy. I won’t lie and say it does not bring me joy.

Peace out like Merle flying out of this water trough.

But, today is a day just like any other though, and many things in this earthly world we live in do not exist within our human schedules and boundaries. A new year in itself, this new year or any other, or a new day for that matter, does not guarantee change on its own or forgiveness from the very life we live. Forgiveness from its hardships or its joy. Its light. Its peace.

That my dear readers, is up to you.

Every day you have a choice. A choice to see and be good or not. A choice to love. A choice to see the joy. A choice to be happy. It is that simple. That is the AHAmoment. One of those keys to life.

Be the change you want to see. If you want greater change of any kind beyond yourself, look within your very person first.

Live the life you wish to see.

Peace.

Love.

Joy.

Be grateful for every morning you wake.

New Year’s Day or any day that I wake up and am able to breathe and see the sunrise, is a blessed day.

I thank Him for it.

Be grateful for the cleansing and growing rain. For the warming and invigorating sun. Both that give us life. Being happy in it and all the gifts of life like this dog. Even if it means wearing rubber boots more than not, trudging through the mud scooping up horse poop. Really, it could be worse! It could be flooding, for instance. Or burning.

I thank Him for it. The gifts of rain, sun, and my Merle. And yes, the poop too!

Oh to be happy like a dog! That is our ultimate goal!

Be grateful for your very life. Take time for yourself and do not be selfish. You can do you while still showing up for your people. Considering them. Be grateful for the people in your life and be grateful for the things in your people’s lives! Each of us in on a unique walk together to the same place. You are not meant to go through exactly what someone else is. Embrace and enjoy it! Community and fellowship is a big part of what makes this life what it is all about.

Classic head shadow does not distract from that mover and shaker.

I thank Him for the people and animals in my life. To be able to do what I love with people I love is one of the greatest blessings!

Slow down and enjoy the little things. Build your life around what brings you joy. Ride more horses. Fish more waters. Hike more paths. Drive more roads.

Lay in the leaves with your dog. When was the last time you played in the leaves??? Inspire the kid within you!

Take more pictures of your actual life. Your actual view. Or draw. Or paint. Or play.

Take the time to hand graze your horse and have quality time. Have quality time with your people. Linger over your coffee. Slow down and enjoy the meal. Count all the colors you see.

Be grateful for your perspective. You are unique and uniquely made for a reason and a purpose!

I thank Him for it!

Do what makes you happy. Be with who makes you happy. Brings you joy. Sparks inspiration. Sees the best in you. Does not take you away from what is good and right. Supports you. Sees life the way you do. Does not shrink from challenges.

You only get one life. A life made up of days, hours, minutes, and seconds. Do not waste a single one. You don’t get any of them back. You might not have tomorrow.

Mad or angry?

Forgive! And then step on.

Find yourself frowning?

Smile!

Are you seeing the dark? Or the negative?

Look for the light! The positive!

Getting mad at someone who just cut you off?

Blare some happy music!

It is all about perspective. Your choice!

Walk in love, dear readers. Embody it!

Let others see and feel it.

They will in turn do the same.